I draw inspiration from many sources, but none so much as from my daughter.
Olivia was born into this world with a lot of uncertainty and heartbreak surrounding her. She immediately struggled to breathe as her airway was being obstructed by her tongue. She was immediately whisked from the delivery room, but not before I noticed the cleft in her eyelid and her tiny misshapen ear. I knew something was terribly wrong, but had no idea what. For several hours, our local hospital worked to find a children’s hospital that had space for her; plans were in the works for either Edmonton or Seattle, when a spot suddenly opened up in Vancouver. It was about 3 am when Olivia and Cory rode the ambulance to BC Children’s. I had to wait until the doctor made her rounds in the morning before I could be discharged. I obviously could not sleep, but prayed over and over for my daughter to live.
When I finally made it to the hospital, I saw my precious girl in her daddy’s arms, and I let out the breath I didn’t realize I had been holding. She looked so peaceful. I was elated. Cory explained how she had to be held on one side with her head tilted down in order to keep her airway open. The doctors informed us that Olivia had a rare syndrome called Goldenhar; it is characterized by a facial difference and either heart, kidney or spinal abnormalities. Olivia was shown to have vertebral anomalies, a cleft palate, a small hole in her eyelid, as well as missing both her left jaw bone and most of her left ear.
From the moment I saw her in the hospital I just knew that there would be no stopping her, and boy was I right. Olivia has undergone eight surgical procedures, starting with her cleft palate repair at nine months of age, and her most recent, teeth extraction, ten months ago. Despite all of the unknowns associated with surgery at her young age, she endured them all with bravery and resilience. Even the most harrowing of surgeries- her jaw replacement which involved harvesting one of her ribs and cartilage to create the jaw bone, was met with practicality. “I won’t be able to eat, so I’ll need lots of popsicles.” My girl understood from an early age that some things just were the way they were. She accepted her difference and it soon led to her uniqueness.
I have spent more hours than I can count, praying that Olivia will grow up confident and secure in who she is. When I said that heartbreak surrounded her birth, it was because I knew that she would not have it easy; she would be required to face battles that most wouldn’t understand. Kids can be mean and I wanted to protect her. I would not however, keep her sheltered. Sure, over the years she has experienced some not-so-nice people and comments, but her faith, her feisty God-given personality, as well as her protective brother and true friends, have all helped make Olivia’s journey easier. In fact, her love for herself and for life exceeds my greatest hopes.
In my ALS journey I admit to sometimes questioning, even complaining, “Why me?”, yet I don’t remember ever hearing these words from Olivia. She believes that God made her special for a reason, and I couldn’t agree more. Her teacher this year reported how confident Olivia was, and how much she helped others overcome their own insecurities. She even turned down the ear reconstruction surgery that was scheduled for this summer because she said that she doesn’t want to be like everyone else. “I like being different and I like my baby ear.” We are fully able to request the surgery if she changes her mind, but for now I’d say she fully embraces who she is. 🙂
I am witness to the incredible qualities she possesses every day; her example gives me strength to face my own journey. She reminds me to take each day as it comes. A week after I was diagnosed she said to me, “Mom, don’t worry, when Jesus decides He wants you in Heaven, He will take you”. Simple as that. 😉 When I was feeling bad that she was tube feeding me, her response, “You tube fed me, now it’s my turn” and when I was feeling guilty that I couldn’t do her hair for dance, “Mom I have been doing my own hair since Grade 3, you wouldn’t be doing it anyway”. Alrighty then.
I could go on, but I think you get the point, my dear daughter is a role model to me for so many reasons. She is also evidence that God knows exactly what He’s doing. I love you Olivia and couldn’t be prouder of you! xo
She’s a beauty inside and out! She must get it from her mama!❤️
Olivia is a reflection of you, Leanne. I admire how you’ve parented her throughout the years…holding her close when needed and giving her just the right amount of freedom to fly. She is an incredible young woman and I am so thankful for her presence in our lives. Sophie adores her and so do I! She is exceptional…just like you. xo
You are such a beautiful and gifted writer Leanne. You and Olivia continue to inspire us all. Love you both so much!! ❤️❤️
What a heart-warming tribute to your daughter Leanne, she sounds like a very wise soul. The resilience of the human spirit will always amaze & inspire me. I wish more people could connect with this inherent strength we all have, some connect with it more easily than others – it sounds like for Olivia it comes really naturally, and as Bonnie mentioned, I’m sure you had something to do with that 😉
And the girl does flips on the trampoline that make me have mini-freak outs! 😊. Lovely young lady-strong, beautiful, and courageous.
She’s amazing and wise! and while reading your post I learned even more extraordinary things about her.
In a world polluted by inauthenticity both of you are a breath of fresh air and inspiration to me. I am so blessed and eternally grateful for knowing all of you. Thank you for this post. I walk away with an even greater profound respect for Olivia. Wise, wise, wise
Thanks for writing this Leanne. It helps us understand the amazing gift that you are to each other. The challenges you both face are more than most could understand but together you are able to take on anything!
That’s such a beautiful tribute to your very beautiful daughter Leanne. She is something very special and so are you.
Oh my Leanne, I am so deeply touched by this sharing & I hope to inspire my daughter with it as well. I remember greeting Olivia in the halls of TCS & despite not really knowing me (she’s a grade or two ahead of my girl) she would always return my hello with a cheerful albeit quiet hi.
Having challenges in life builds character & depth that nothing else can. I believe with my whole heart that it is very special people who get God’s most precious treasures. You were given Olivia because He knew you could be trusted with an amazing treasure. In turn she was also given a special gift & that is the treasure that you are Leanne. God is good & He alone is great, far greater than any of his creations but that he pays such special attention to all the tiny details of each of our lives is something that makes me completely dumb with wonder.
I have asked the question “why me” on more than a few occasions in my life when circumstances have been hard & the answer always comes from God’s mercy & grace. We would not be human if we didn’t ask that question & he is always there ready to help us in our darkest & most helpless hours. The Lord knows what we need & in those times of greatest need he alone provides.
I have to admit though that I’m not the quickest to turn all my troubles over to Him. I think if I could be more immediate with turning to Him I would be blessed with a peace that would carry me through but I unfortunately have the tendency to try to ‘manage’ on my own. It never works! I’m an awfully slow learner but God seems ever so patient with me & meets me whenever I finally turn to Him for the help I need.
Thank you for sharing your journey with me Leanne. I am seeing God’s hand at work through you & I am grateful. May God bless you with more of His Mercies & that you will see & feel His presence every moment of the day. May his peace reign in you as you journey on.
~Beverly
Ps. Olivia’s growing up! She’s absolutely beautiful! Just like her momma!😊
That was beautiful, Thankyou for sharing that 💜♥️💙
What a blessing to have a daughter who loves you. I haven’t seen my daughter in 25 years, and have never met my 4 grandchildren.